Frank and Carys, about a half hour after her birth, in our bedroom.

Today she is three, as if that were possible, as if she will not always be this tiny baby in my mind's eye.

Every year I get very reflective on my children's birthdays, I marvel at the age that they are turning (how can it be!?), and relive their births in my head all day. I'm not sure if other mother's do this, but really for me their birthdays feel like a celebration of my own journey as a mama...and a time to reflect on their births from my own perspective. My experiences of giving birth to my children were so powerful, especially with Carys. I chose to have her at home, after having Jasper in a birthing center and knowing that I just feel more comfortable laboring in my own space.
She took her time, making me wait 14 days after her estimated due date, but my midwife was patient and encouraged me to be also. I prayed and pleaded for labor to start, and waiting all of those days was a torturous journey of its own in which I learned so much about letting go! On the night of the 14th day, at 11PM, my water broke and I was immediately in intense active labor. Carys was born less than 2 hours later at 12:56AM, 10 minutes after our midwife arrived. She came so quickly, so naturally. After waiting months to meet her, and wondering the whole time who she would be, I reached for her and placed her against my body on our bed and felt as if I just knew her...I already knew her soft presence.

Happy Birthday my Beautiful Girl!